Defeating Life’s Final Boss

I’m doing it again. I’m approaching life like a video game with a final boss, and I’m going into battle daily, “leveling up” to defeat it.

Shit. I’m doing it again. I’m approaching life like a video game with a final boss, and I’m going into battle daily, “leveling up” to defeat it.

Maybe it’s all those years of playing video games as a kid. You wire yourself that there is a beginning, a middle, and an end. That end has some larger-than-life evil character you must defeat to get to the cheesy “ride off into the sunset” montage and then eventually roll the credits.

The most iconic final boss of my generation and lifetime is Bowser from Nintendo’s Super Mario.

So here I am, a 42-year-old man finding myself back in a pattern of approaching life trying to defeat the "King of the Koopas," an anthropomorphic turtle that inhabits the world of the Mushroom Kingdom.

If I get to my life’s final boss, if I defeat “Bowser,” I suppose I win and get happiness?

• Happiness is the meaning and purpose of life, the whole aim, and the end of human existence.

  • Aristotle

So if for Aristotle, happiness is not an emotion but the long-term pattern of action creating the sum of what makes up your moral character. It is the habits of virtue acquired over the years of your learning, experiences, and actions following those virtues.……

What this tells me is that my life is way more like Link from Zelda's than Mario's.

Let me explain…. …

See, Zelda is a game that places its main character, Link, in a fantasy world. You go through this fantasy world searching for items to acquire. It is riddled with side-quests and has a degree of character-building and customization. It’s likened to an RPG (role-playing game), but the hardcore gamers will scold you and tell you are very very wrong for even insinuating they are the same, and Zelda is certainly not an RPG.

(Please accept my deep apology for those I have offended)

For the sake of my writing, let’s assume it is as an RPG is:

A role-playing video game is a genre where the player controls the actions of a character (and/or several party members) immersed in some well-defined world, usually involving character development by recording statistics.

Mario, on the other hand (at least the old-timey versions I played), was considered a platform game. This is the game style where players control a character who traverses levels that increase in difficulty to reach or attain a particular goal. All Mario could do was move left to right, up and down, to always move forward in the level until that level was complete. Then on to the next level.

For Mario, the goal is to finish all the levels to defeat Bowser and save the princess.

So, where am I going with this self-indulgent journey into my childhood video game closet?

When I’m feeling out of balance, and my energy feels off, I pause and say:

“Am I Link or Mario right now”

If I’m Mario, I’m just moving through life from left to right and up and down, facing obstacles and trying to “save the princess” and defeat Bowser. No growth, just obstacles that get harder as you get older, and no joy until the end when you save the princess and ROLL CREDITS.

If I’m Link, I’m acquiring skills, having experiences, meeting people, and collecting meaningful items along the journey. Feels a bit more like the life I want, but not quite…

The flaw in comparing my life to Zelda's is it’s still about good triumphing over evil, good vs. bad, and ultimately winning. I often find myself piling so much on my plate to “level up,” buy the things, get the promotion, and “win life.”

When I approach life by putting in all this work to prepare myself to defeat its final boss, I take no time to enjoy the process and the joy of what’s around me. It’s all about that next level; it’s all about the next quest and all about the next thing.

So back to Aristotle…

I agree that:

“Happiness is the meaning and purpose of life.”

I agree that:

“Happiness is not pleasure, nor is it virtue. It is the exercise of virtue.”

What I can't entirely agree with is that:

“Happiness cannot be achieved until the end of one's life.”

So what does that mean for me?

To find happiness, instead of thinking about defeating a final boss, I will focus on the joy of the process and the little and big moments that create the sum of what makes up who I am and who I’m becoming.

Instead of thinking I have to “win,” I shift focus to the joy of the journey and the experiences along the way. Instead of thinking about what’s next, focusing on what is right in front of me and on the present moment.